Byeeeeeee

I don’t really feel like writing about finally being done school and home for the summer. Partly because the Raptors game is on and I’m distracted, and partly because I’d be dooming this post to be hella boring.

I mean, it’s cool being home. It was a little sad leaving school. I’m happy it’s summer. Being a don was great. Second year was bearable. I met some neat people. I’m somewhat looking forward to next year. It’s nice to be able to sleep.

Boring.

I guess I’m not really feeling it this week. All I have to write about is my every day life, and I don’t find my every day life to be much of a thrill. Maybe I need to do something interesting, like join a cult, or fight crime under a pseudonym.

Though I guess if I were to be under a pseudonym I couldn’t write about it on this blog, because it would reveal my secret identity.

Maybe I could be like Peter Parker and pretend like I’m besties with my super hero alter ego so I have all the intel on her crime fighting but am sworn to secrecy about her (my) real identity. Now THAT would make for a good blog post.

But alas, I’m just boring old Marryl.

Maybe I’ll go on some crazy adventures this summer? The world is my oyster, so they say. Although this summer I’ll be working full time 40+ hours a week and also taking two online courses through Waterloo. So stranger’s gardens and a stack of textbooks are my oyster. Though I’m taking a French class for the first time in two and a half years so I’ll hopefully relearn how to speak French, which is pretty dope.

(Side note: I’ve adopted the habit of using words like “dope” and “yo” and “hella”. I’m working on contextualizing “clutch”. Why? Who knows. I’m probably annoying a lot of people.)

Anyway. That’s enough of this dull post. I’ll work on building up enough energy to last me through the next handful of Wednesdays to produce something that’s actually interesting.

Now if you’ll excuse me, the Raptors are up by nine and I need to go yell at them when they inevitably start to lose their lead.

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Don’t read this post

If you’re reading this, that means you didn’t listen to me, and honestly I do not think that is a very good way to start off this budding relationship between the two of us. So if you could kindly go back, reread the title, and actually absorb what it says, I think that would be beneficial for all parties and would lead us down a path to a more trusting friendship.

Don’t read this post because it doesn’t contain any heart wrenching anecdotes from my life. I did not pour all of my emotions into the keyboard for this one, sorry. If you came here to fetch yet another item of my dirty laundry and praise me for the utter nakedness in my writing, unfortunately for you I am fully clothed today (though fortunately for me because my blinds are drawn).

Don’t read this post because it contains little to no intentional humour. This Wednesday is not riddled with sassy comments and unacceptable puns. “But Marryl, your anatomy is comprised of 83% both those things!” I know. I’m having an identity crisis over it, believe me.

Don’t read this post because it probably won’t be very long, or consequential at all. I have an exam in an hour and a half and instead of cramming I am meeting my Wednesday quota, so the panic of this exam will likely set in very soon and I’ll stop writing in the middle of a

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Wow I really fooled you guys. You totally thought I was just going to stop. GOTCHA.)

(Don’t read this post because of that bad attempt at a joke. I said “little to no” humour, not zero, okay…)

If you’ve come to the end of this post, that means you did in fact read this post, and I am very disappointed in you. You did exactly what I asked you not to, breaking the sacred internet bond we have with one another. You should be ashamed. Unless this whole don’t-read-this thing was a clever reverse-psychology plot to actually get you to read it. Maybe I had nothing to write about but still wanted to maintain my viewer statistics so I came up with this clever ruse to cover up the fact that this post is the Seinfeld of blog posts: it’s about nothing.

Pfffft, yeah right, like I would ever do that…

… haha… ha…

11 silly things that are intended to cheer you up but may just make you question why you read this blog

If you’re a university student you’re probably stressing hard right now. Heck, if you’re a human being you’re probably stressing hard right now. So here is a list of things I hope will put you in a good mood. They’re pretty weird, but so am I.

 

#1. First thing’s first, I think we should all live by these socks:

photo

Fun fact I bought them the other day. Those are my feet. I own those socks.

(Make silly purchases. They make everything better.)

 

#2. My favourite joke:

Where does a king keep his armies?

In his sleevies.

 

#3. Pro tip: it doesn’t have to be your birthday for you to buy a birthday cake. The grocery store doesn’t ID you. So go live your life and eat your cake too.

 

#4. First Floor Generator by Freelance Whales is one of my favourite songs of all time, and one time they performed it on a New York subway platform. I don’t know why but I think it’s hella cool. Maybe you’ll agree. But maybe also not. I don’t know. JUST WATCH OKAY.

 

#5. How to draw:

 Step one: Grab something to draw with and something to draw on.

Step two: Draw an enclosed shape. It could be a circle. It could be an oval. It could be a rhombus. Go with your gut (especially if your gut is shaped like a heptagon).

Step three: Give your shape some eyes. They don’t have to match.

Step four: Add some ears. They don’t have to be the ears of any specific animal. Just go with the flow.

Step five: Does your shape mainly feast on chocolate cake, or they more of a two-baby-carrot-limit kind of creature? Draw a body that suggests its dietary habits.

Step six: Draw on some legs. Make sure you seriously consider how tall and fast your shape will be. This will alter the course of its life forever.

Step seven: Finally, decide what emotional state your shape is in and draw the mouth in an expression that reflects that emotional state.

Congratulations, you have your very own THING. What’s a thing? Who knows. It’s whatever you made it. But it’s all yours. Now go have a lovely chat with your Thing about your life and your day. Those ears your drew make it a great listener. They also like to take naps on all your problems, which usually hides them for a while.

 

#6. I just found out today that Beyoncé and Jay-Z are going on tour together and if that doesn’t cheer your up then I don’t know what will.

 

#7. If you have a mac, open up PhotoBooth. If you don’t, grab your phone and put the camera in selfie mode. Or if you’re feeling old fashioned, look in a mirror. Then make a super silly face. And not the actually-trying-to-look-cute silly face, like a real-silly silly face. Take a picture. Here’s mine:

Photo on 2014-04-16 at 11.10 AM #2

No shame no gain, right?

 

#8. Another joke:

What’s Witney Huston’s favourite type of coordination?

HAAAAAAAAAND EYEEEEEEEEEE

 

#9. If you are a Game of Thrones fan and have watched the newest episode with the Purple wedding, listen to this 8tracks playlist and weep at it’s hilarity.

IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE EPISODE DON’T CLICK IT BECAUSE IT CONTAINS THE BIGGEST SPOILER AND I DON’T WANT TO BE THE PERSON THAT RUINED IT FOR YOU.

 

#10. You know how cute babies are?

One time you were a baby.

That’s pretty great.

 

#11. Go find a nice, cleanish stretch of carpet and lie down on the floor on your back for a bit. Just lie there. If you feel the impulse to fall asleep, go with it. You be you. The floor has the magical power of making you feel better. Don’t question it, just do it.

 

And hey, if you’re feeling down, just own whatever you do, even if it doesn’t exactly go well. Fake it til you make it, right?

5YovKN3

The end

As my second year of university comes to a close, I feel both obligated an hesitant to write about all of the things in my life that are ending and beginning. I feel obligated because this is the midpoint of my university life, which is a big deal. I feel hesitant because it seems clichéd to write weeks of posts called “the end”, and I really don’t like to do what is expected of me.

“But Marryl, you called this post ‘the end’, ya big hypocrite.”

Well, yes. But this isn’t exactly a post about endings. It’s a post about how I feel about writing about endings. So it’s a meta post. Alternative title: the meta-end.

I’ve had one hell of a year. Perhaps the greatest reason why I do not want to write summaries of things that have happened to me this year is that this has not been the best year for me, and I am not sure how much of it I am willing to share. I am a big advocate for being very open with myself and others on this blog, but there are some topics that I am mildly fearful of being honest with myself over. So my solution for not writing fully truthful recounts of this past year is to not write about it at all.

Yeah, that’s not a very productive solution.

That last paragraph included a lot of beating around the bush. Okay, brief summary:

I started a job that changed my life in so many wonderful ways, and truly has made me a better person. I also faced a lot of mental stress brought on by numerous situations the job put me in that I was trained for but never fully expected. I struggled a lot with knowing whether or not I was doing the right thing all the time, while also trying to remind myself that life exists outside of the parameters set by this job. I floundered a bit.

I went through second year of my theatre program, a year in which you do a lot of stuff. I threw myself into the work I had to do for my acting classes, and the whole while I felt like I was really growing. I do still feel like I grew a lot in respect to acting, but I’m also terrified because I have such a long way to go. I recognize that I still have two years, but I can’t get behind or I’ll never catch up. I never actually considered dropping out of the program, but I had a number of conversations with myself about whether or not this is right for me, and if I wasn’t doing this what else could I possibly do? Which is terrifying. I also struggled with dealing with a lot of aspects of this program that I do not agree with but know I can’t do much about. This year I really realized that I love this program, but I also don’t.

I grew incredibly apathetic towards a lot of my academics, which I am disappointed in myself for.

I balanced school and work and extra stuff and life and for a while my life was a constant stream of going from one place to another without time to breathe. I loved it, because I love being busy, but I think it drained me more than I let myself believe.

I made a lot of new friends, but I also grew incredibly distanced from very close friends. When I get really stressed or overwhelmed I like to become a socially reclusive turtle who refuses to reach out to people, and I felt like that for a good chunk of this year. And this on top of everything else was extra tough.

I dealt with a number of family issues that I was not in the mental state to deal with and still am not. I also dealt with some personal issues, mainly trying to come to grips with how I feel about myself and how I subsequently treat myself. It has been a very self reflective year.

Okay. So I just listed a bunch of not so good things about my year which probably doesn’t look so good. They are all honest thoughts and feelings and I completely validate the relevance of all of these things. But it’s important, mostly for my sanity, to note the great things that have happened this year. I met some wonderful people and have made some great friends. I experienced a dream of a job, regardless of the stress, through which I met some amazing students who mean a lot to me. I grew closer with my parents. I grew as a person. I saw a Beyoncé concert. I cut my hair on a whim. I started this blog.

So it hasn’t been all bad. Actually it hasn’t even been bad. It’s just been a challenge. So I would maybe kind of sort of like to go into detail about some of these things to talk them through with myself, because in the whirlwind of this year I haven’t had much time to process. But I’m genuinely afraid of being open about some of these topics, a feeling that concerns me a little. What I’m trying to say is bare with me over the next few weeks as I sort my self out.

EXCEPT I PROMISE TO NEVER CUT IT THIS CLOSE WHEN POSTING ON A WEDNESDAY EVER AGAIN HOLY CRAP THIS HAS CAUSED TO MUCH ANXIETY I APOLOGIZE.

My friend Matt wrote a book

See, Matt, I told you I’d write a blog post about you. Be careful what you wish for.

If you know Matt, you are fully aware that he wrote a book as a part of his “Making a Book” class at the University of Toronto, since he’s been talking about nothing but for the past eight months. (Kidding, Matt. You wrote a whole book. You’re allowed to talk about it.) If you don’t know Matt, then you can learn more about the book and his experiences here. The book was published, and I bought my copy off of him yesterday.

Holding a for realizes physical published copy of a book written by someone you know is such a strange experience, let me tell you.

Matt is my friend and this is a very big deal, so I thought I’d comment on it. Also one time when I had writer’s block and asked Matt what I should write Marecredi about that week, he half-jokinly said to write about him. Or at least I’m interpreting it as half-jokingly, because otherwise this post might come off as certifiably creepy.

First of all, it’s a very pretty looking book so I’m happy to add it to my shelf. If anyone asks me about it I’ll probably play it off as a collection of writing from a 16th century Italian philosopher who also discovered the cure for polio on the side which I read because I’m super sophisticated.

(Kidding, Matt.)

I won’t give much in the way of a review, because I haven’t finished the whole book yet. But I will say that so far, the writing does this really wonderful thing where it gets the point across while also never telling the full story. The book somehow makes you yearn for what happens next, yet also leaves you content. Because that’s how life works: stories and memories and moments are always unfinished, and the feelings you feel and the experiences you have aren’t wrapped up nicely in a final sentence. It’s incredibly real and relatable.

Matt, it feels weird to say I’m proud of you, because I am neither your grandmother nor your third grade school teacher. Also because I’ve only known you for a little over seven months. But regardless of any of that, you wrote a book, a whole book, AND got it published, and that’s pretty damn cool. That is something that so many people, including myself, dream of but never accomplish, and you’ve done it before your 23rd birthday. Holding your book in my hands makes me want to push myself to be able to one day hold my own book in my hands, sooner rather than later. Keep doing you, because you is doing pretty well.

(Note to self: brush up on grammar before beginning to write.)

OKAY I’m feel super creepy and have been contemplating deleting this post every second that I’ve been writing it so I’m just going to click “publish” and be done with it. But Matt told me to write about him so THIS IS WHAT HE GETS. And now you’re forced to returned the favour, Matt. HA.

But don’t post it on a Wednesday.

Wednesdays are mine.